Hate her yet Love her.

Have you ever love and hate a person at the same time? I have all my life.
I don't understand why she lets bitterness overcome her.
Why she is so jealous of her sis in law and yet at the same time wants to be like her.
Why she doesn't see her action will cause her children to distance themselves from her.
Doesn't she understand that love will grow cold and indifference will starts and soon the heart will harden and love won't be there anymore when she takes out the bitterness on her sis in law to her children? Actions do speak louder than words. Her mouth says no but her actions say yes loud and clear.
Her children works and just want to come back to work to unwind, relax and recharge before going back to work the next day. Is that too much to ask?
What is so bad about using the car to fetch her sister in law and her family to airport? When we go to the airport, her bro in law also fetch us to the airport. Why use the slipper and beat on the floor and mumbling whatever like those 'sam pat poh' in the street?
The children has reason, cajole, explain, shouted, thrown tantrum to make her understand that her action is making them unable to stand her not any negative words from her sis in law.
But she still thinks it is negative words from her sis in law that warrant the distancing of her children from her. No reasoning with her because her mind is made up. So all the children can do is go out till late at night and come home just to sleep or come home and lock themselves in the room in order to be able to continue to love her just because she is mother. Damn pathetic life!
The daughter wishes she can die early like her dad so as not to endure this torture from the mother.
Daughter also worry for the brother safety as he is always on the road and high blood pressure wants to come and live with him. No thanks to the mother.

Change I must

The feeling of hopelessness is on me. I have very low faith and yet I am unwiling to face the task ahead of me. I am running away from my task when the going gets tough. I guess this is the weakness that has been rooted in me since young. Being a pampered child of my granny does have consequences. I was told if it gets too hard you can give up and hence there was never once a task I started out has been completed because I am afraid of hardwork.
Yep this is the hard reality I have to face and endure and overcome.
I overcoming and starting over at this age is really tough and to have no fear of hardwork and enduring hardship is once that I would avoid at any length 'cos fat old me hates it.
Yep there are lots of faults I have to overcome... low self-esteem, procastination, glutonny, easily give up and slowness. So far this are the faults that God is highlighting and making me acknowledge and change. Change I must or I end up being bitter and helpless. Pastor says our body needs 3 days to adapt to changes and 30 days to form habits. He also says in today's sermon burning coal in Isaiah 6:6 represent the coal soak in the blood of Christ and refine in fire.
It tells me that I am forgiven for my sins yes those old bad habits are my sins and I have to die to myself and be refine/ purify by fire. A hard decision for me. I guess in the end I will chose this road but at times I do get weak and revert back to my old habits. That is why constant prayer and the word of God must be my companion for all eternity. They are my stenght.

You can't judge a book by its cover.

How true it is they saying that you can't judge a book by it's cover.
I went to Redang with a collegue expecting a very 'siu jie' kind of person and found that she actual isn't. She actually can backpack very well, has the stamina for it and has a knack of making friends everywhere even a the entrance of Mydin, she made friends with the guard. Amazing girl. I stand humble and corrected at my assumption of her.

A valuable lesson learnt of not assuming characters of friends. People change and react to situation differently. Sometimes we are so biase in our assumption of them that we forgot to give them a chance to prove themselves.

Family Trip to KK 6 May to 9 May 2011

I made it mandatory to bring my family for annual family trip since my dad passed away in 2008. It could be local or overseas depending on the budget and if I can get cheap airfare.
I manage to book a trip to KK for 3 pax at RM187.00 which to me was a bargain (included breakfast and luggage and seat) last year. A decision to bring mom and brother there as they have never been to East Malaysia.

Such a lovely skyview from the plane window.

KK town is relatively easy to move around and mom and bro manage to entertain themselves shopping (What? shopping in KK?) and catching the beautiful waterfront sunset there while I go off to see my collegues.

I went to the famous Fook Yuen for their ever famous Roti Kahwin no, not the Damai branch but the one in next to the Sabah Tourism. Didn't like the toasted roti kahwin. The normal one is just heavenly.. soft bread, kaya and slice of butter. I like it so much that I bought the loaf of bread home on my last day.

There is a famous restaurant next to the hotel that I am staying Kinabalu Daya Hotel. The restaurant is call Fatt Kee but then you can see the whole restaurant under Ang's Hotel Signboard. The Oyster Garlic sauce chicken wing is their signature dish. I like it very much. Decided to order the ever famous Sabah Veg and this has become my newfound fav veg. The teowchew style Sek Pan Fish is good too. Fresh and yummy but then the sauce is a little to thick for my liking.

I pre-book a day tour (during MATTA fair)to Kudat on the 2nd day. The highlight of my trip was to see the tip of Borneo. Bro's friends say that it crazy to go 3hrs just for the view and back. I think it's worth it. I do so enjoy the view. The tour include Bee farm,Gong making and Rungus longhouse. Only thing is we didn't get to see gong making as someone died in the village and for 15days there would not be gong making and hitting of gong. I love the coolness of the longhouse and the simple lunch provide is delicious. Fresh grown vegs and ayam kampung. Some of the veg I have no idea what it is but it taste so fresh and good.

The view before reaching tip of Borneo. I reach there at 2pm and it was really hot but the cool breeze made me want to stay till sunset. Unfortunately I can't as I got 3hrs drive back to KK on a bumpy road. Arrive KK town from Kudat at 6pm and decide to watch sunset at Waterfront and then to Selera Kg Air (SEDCO) for a seafood dinner. Not that cheap but it is fresh. I think the best dish I like is actually the coconut pudding (RM12). I will just go there for the pudding only, the seafood better eat out of town ie in penampang.

The 3rd day we woke up late, walk around Gaya Street Sunday market, bought mom a pario as it is Mother's day and went to Manukan Island. Just spend 2hrs of facing the sea, eating ice-cream and getting lovely sea breeze... such relaxing time. At last got to get back to KK town as I got dinner appointment.My friend's hubby, Robert is so nice to bring us out for breakfast in Damai on our last day in KK. Went for the ever famous Mix fish noodles. According to Robert, it is norm for KK people to have Mix fish or mix beef or pork noodles for breakfast. My first fish 'chap' noodle. Ok soup not that fishy as the soup has chinese celery and tomates. Fish also fresh. Yummy.Had a late lunch of Pork noodle and the off to the airport. Not bad. I like it better than our Subang Jaya ever famous pork noodle. I guess Robert is right, to sample all KK food I will have to make another trip to KK. So glad mom and bro enjoy this trip. Let's hope next year's annual family trip will be better especially it is with naggy mom.

Dinner at Moussandra

I bought 2 e-vouchers and got bro dear to fetch me to KL for dinner. Poor dear had to wait for me till 8pm before we go. He was growling by the time we left and not only from hunger pangs...his face was turn purplish black. I like the Medditeranean feel of the restaurant and the quaint telephone where I am seated. Too bad my table was not lighted with candles.
I find the food ok only but I love the creme brulee. Got me interested to search the internet and want to make it. It so light and smooth and the thin layer of burnt crunchy sugar top on the creme brulee...hmm heavenly. Drat now I got a craving for it and I am on diet....

My virgin Sangria... Not nice at all better to order the not virgin one.

Cream of pumpkin soup. Ok only. Too sweet for me.

Yummy mushroom soup. Not the can type. But then I am always partial to made from scratch mushroom soup.

I love the Mojito. Very refreshing. This one got no alcohol. Just sugar, lime, sprite and peppermint leaves.

Seafood paella. I like this but it's a little too oily for me.

I am also partial to wood fire pizza. This is nicely made.

The coffee and ice-cream is good. The sweetness of the vanilla ice-cream compliment the bitterness of lavazza coffee. That is till I have my fist taste of creme brulee. The silky smoothness of cream with the waffle thin cruchiness of burnt sugar....oooh heavenly.

But then this is my first creme brulee so I haven't tried any before. So there is no comparison.